Modesty: It's Not Just About the Clothes

Blogger and longtime GFG reader Rebekah shares her thoughts on the importance of modesty -- inside and out.

DIY Lace Shorts

Wish your shorts were just a few inches longer? Want to add some extra style to your outfit? With a little lace, denim, and sewing, you can have the perfect pair of shorts.

Hot or Not: Summer Clothes

When it comes to modesty, are your clothes missing the mark? Check out these summer wardrobe hits and misses to help you make more stylish fashion choices.

A Guy's View: What Guys Want in a Girl

Zachary, 21, reveals what guys really want in a future wife.

           

 I was asked recently what a Godly man finds attractive, or rather what he looks for as he seeks a wife. This is obviously a loaded question because we are all so very different; both men and women. There are, however, a few things that hold true for everyone who professes faith in Jesus Christ. Here is what the Bible has given us, as men, to qualify “an excellent wife.” This list is pretty crazy but it is so true.

How to Stay Modest in a Costume

When you're wearing a costume for a performance or recital, it can be hard to stay modest because your instructor chooses what you will wear and you are expected to look like your peers. Dance costumes often show off your body more than normal clothes because the focus is on the lines your body creates while dancing. It may be difficult to dress modestly while performing in costume, but it's not impossible.

Swimdresses

Different people have different modesty standards, just like different people have different bodies. If you're plus sized, self concious, or simply want a more modest alternative to other swimwear (including those I've featured), here is about as far as you can go modestly without sacrificing style in the process.

Comfortable, breezy, and slimming, this swimwear from BecomingSwimdress.com will keep you covered and confident at the pool. They come in several styles and look attractive in both the front and back. Say goodbye to baggy modest swimwear that looks more like ugly clothes and say hello to these pretty water dresses!
While I prefer my tankinis, if your modesty standards are higher for yourself, then you should definetly check these out.

Guy Talk: Is Modesty Attractive?

"As a Christian guy, modesty is SO attractive. I don't mean attractive in a lustful way, but that to see a girl living out God's standards in her life really is beautiful. And you have no idea just how much you would be helping your Christian brothers by being modest. We're not trying to blame you for our impurity, that's between us and God, but you can do so much to encourage and help us in our battle by being modest."
 -- real teen guy, age 16

Dads: The New Fashionistas?

Did you know that your dad can help you with your fashion choices? Believe it or not, it’s true. While he may not have the best sense of style in the world, your dad can be invaluable in helping you with your clothing choices. How? If he says a skirt is too short or a shirt is too low, listen to him. He’s a guy and knows exactly how teenage boy brains work. He understands what a guy will be thinking when he sees you in that new dress -- so you’d be wise to listen to his advice. Color combinations, on the other hand, are unlikely to be your father’s area of expertise.

A Message for YOU

This is a message for all you girls who want to be beautiful.
This is a message to all of you young women who want to be accepted. Loved. Cherished.
I write this to the girl who hopes to find her worth in the wrong places -- in her boyfriend, in her peers, in her job, in her money, in the way she dresses. Your worth is not found in these. No matter how hard you search, if you look to worldly things, you'll never find what you're looking for.
Your worth is found in Jesus Christ and Him alone.
JESUS defines you.
JESUS loves you.
JESUS values you.
JESUS gives you value.
JESUS is what you've been looking for.
It's all Jesus. It's not you. It's not any guy. It's not anything the media will tell you. It's all Jesus.
Only Jesus can add to your worth.
And only Jesus can help you discover it.

What did you wear to church today? Let's hope it's

• modest
• figure-flattering
• an expression of how much you love the Lord
• something that makes you feel beautiful

So, does God really care about what you wore today? Heck yeah! I've said on One Voice that when you give your life to Jesus, your cares become His cares. How you look is important to you -- and to God! He wants you to look and feel your best.

How do you look your best for church? You follow the 4 guidlines above. But there's more. We all know that an outfit becomes amazing when the girl inside it is amazing. She can look absolutely plain, but if she truly loves God, she honestly shines. You can see her love for Jesus in the way she speaks, acts, and dresses. Jesus is shining through her! And that, girl, is beautiful!

............

I want to hear what you wore today!! Post a comment. Did you break any of the guidelines? Which ones? How can you make the outfit better next time? Did you shine for Jesus?

I'm wearing a hot pink dress (Macys), with a black patent leather belt under my chest and patent leather black shoes (Payless) with earrings from Compass Trading Co. and a gold/pink topaz ring from Aruba. Modesty Check: The dress almost reaches my knees; the waist is drawn in but not squeezing.

Sending the Wrong Message?

Candies brand clothing says it supports abstinence and wants to help prevent teen pregnancy, and yet they come out with these. First it was a tee that said "Be Sexy: It Doesn’t Mean You Have to Have Sex". Now it’s this?
I think they’re sending out the wrong messages. Immodest clothing + sexual abstinence = … well, let’s just say the abstinence is forgotten.
It’s kind of like what was happening in the church in Corinth (check out 1&2 Corinthians). The people of Corinth went to church, but their church was really messed up. They had tons of arguments over silly things and they really screwed up. Paul wrote 2 letters to them (1&2 Corinthians), stressing the point that CHURCH + SIN = CHAOS, not God. The people of Corinth were sending the wrong messages to other people about how Christians should act.
God tells us we can’t serve 2 different things. We can’t serve God and money (or wordly pleasures, or sin, or Satan). In the same way, we can’t advertise being sexually pure while wearing shirts that are sexually appealing.
It’s like a vegan wearing a coat with a design that says, "DON’T KILL ANIMALS"…but the coat is made of leopard skin. Do you think people will listen to her when she says not to kill animals? Not anymore.
Wearing a shirt that says premarital-sex is a bad thing is cool…but when the shirt screams "sexy", you’re sending out the wrong message.

I'd like to know your thoughts on this.

Nancy Rue's Fashion Secret

"When you shop, buy clothes that fit you. You should never look like you've been stuffed into your outfit, no matter what the current style is. Be sure you can move around freely. Forget that your best friend wears 2 sizes smaller than you do. She's her size, you are yours. This is a free and exciting time in your life, so be comfy enough to have a blast!" - Nancy Rue

Nancy Rue is the author of a bazillion books including Beauty Lab, The It's My Life Book, The Beauty Book, The Body Book, and the FaithGirlz series The Lily Series and The Sophie Series. Her books are for young girls who seek their true, beautiful identity in Christ. Pick some up at Mardels or another Christian bookstore.

Seventeen Says Subtle is Sexy

Seventeen magazine recently featured a bit about celebrities changing their styles. They featured one woman who typically dressed in an immoddest way, showing lots of cleavage. They gave her a style makeover, changing her look from -- well, "hoochie mama" as What Not to Wear's style expert Stacy London would say -- to a more moddest, but even more stylish, look. "She's really learning that subtle is sexy," Seventeen told us. It's a fresh look.

Sometimes girls think that if they wear super low-cut shirts and short shorts and bouses that barely cover their stomachs, they'll be noticed. Someone will love them. But that's not the case. If you dress immoddestly, you'll only be getting the wrong kind of attention. You'll be noticed by people who, deep down, you really don't want to be noticed by. And the good guys? Well, they're not going to go for you because they want to find a girl who honors who body and dresses like she respects herself. Next time you hold up a super-short dress or a miniskirt that barely covers your bottom, think again. As Seventeen would say, "Subtle is sexy."

Looking your Best

God does want you to look your best. The woman of noble character that Proverbs talks about “is clothed in fine linen and purple” (Proverbs 31:22). Purple, in Biblical times, was considered the most fashionable color – royalty often wore it. Not only that, but about her family: “all of them are clothed in scarlet” (verse 21). Scarlet is a bright red color, which can also be considered highly fashionable in Biblical times.

Now, this can be kinda confusing. So we’re supposed to look like supermodels, like we just stepped out of Limited Too or the cover of Seventeen magazine? Actually, no. That’s not at all what God is saying. God doesn’t care how expensive the label is on your shirt. What God is talking about is when you put on clothes that look good and feel awesome on you, that says, “I want people to see the real me, a person who deserves respect.” Now that’s confidence!

Media vs. Modesty

Flip through any fashion magazine and you’ll see women wearing next to nothing. Being “hot” today usually means showing lots of skin. So do you ever think you need to dress like that to get a guy’s attention? Have you ever believed that’s what it takes to fit in?

Let me tell you something. While a lot of girls these days are walking around nearly naked, that doesn’t mean you have to. I know a lot of modest girls who don’t wear those trashy outfits, and those modest girls are still beautiful – even cooler than the immodest girls! You don’t have to expose your body to a sinful world to be pretty.

1 Timothy 2:9-10 says that God wants us to be modest and to dress ourselves in good deeds (which a lot of people forget to put on). There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be beautiful or noticed. However, honoring God comes before everything else. Period. That’s it. When you dress modestly, you’re worshipping God! You’re telling the whole world that you’re a young woman who’s so cool – inside and out – that you don’t need to show your body to be noticed.

Make a habit of modesty and dress yourself in loving behavior that honors God – and yourself!

Guys Speak on Modesty

“When I see a girl who’s wearing revealing clothes, I can tell that she doesn’t have very much self-respect, and I wish someone would go up and tell her that she’s worth more than that.”—Josiah, 17