Q: Melissa, I have a friend who is ignoring me. She's moved on and the sad thing is she doesn't even know it. What do I do?
A: Losing a friend is painful. You're right -- she probably doesn't even realize she's leaving you out! I'll share with you my 2 big ideas, and you can go from there.
Maybe she needs some space. I can hear you now: "But she HAS space! That’s the problem!" But the truth is, she really doesn’t. She doesn’t have the friendly, comfortable space that she needs to sort her problems. The space right now is most likely tense and uncomfortable for both of you. She needs to know that you’re OK with her having other friends and having her own life, but at the same time you want to remain friends. There is nothing worse than following her around like a lost puppy begging her to play with you.
Now that you’re comfortable with her having other friends, it’s time to confront her again. This is going to be hard – really hard. But it’s super important. In fact, it may just save your friendship. Let her know in a friendly, sincere, loving way that you’re hurt. Tell her that you’d like to be even better friends and that this friendship is very special to you. Invite her to spend the day – or the night! – at your house, just having fun and being friends. Plus, stick around for the next post which will have tons of fun ideas on how to make the most of a girls-night-in. This girl needs to know that you love her and that she’s really special to you.
The last thing you could do is pray. Ask God that – if it would result in a healthy, encouraging relationship – you and your friend could be close again. Ask Him to open her heart to you and ask for the willpower and courage to confront her and invest in her life. Finally, keep us updated.
Remember, if you've tried all this honestly and lovingly, and you've tried the ideas in the next post, and she still gives you the cold shoulder, maybe it's time for YOU to move on, too. If she has no interest in the friendship anymore, is she really your friend? Is the friendship really worth keeping? Was your friendship based on honesty, love, encouragement? Was it centered around Christ? Did it build you up? If not, let it go.
For super fun, girly things to do, check out the next post!